thecatinahat | (no subject)

If Julie walks in on this, she's going to get the wrong idea.

Or, really, the right idea, let's be real.

"They can't have me," he agrees, feeling a little bit smug that Cougar is so certain his sisters would try to fight him for the dubious honor of having Jake as their own. "Though I doubt they're going to try very hard once they actually get to know me."

"You always do this," he complains when Jake starts to put himself down again. "You talk as if you are not important or not special, but you are. I love you," he says heatedly. "Do you think my love is not worth much? Do you think I would give it to just anyone?"

"No," he says firmly, creeping his fingers slowly inside of Jake's trousers to rub a little at the small of his back. "Stop being like that, if I am to stop being a moron."

Five minutes of Cougar telling him he loves him because of who he is isn't going to undo almost a quarter century of hearing the opposite. Cougar is going to have to put up with Jake's low self esteem for a very long time.

"Alright, I'll stop," he says, but what he really means is 'I'll stop talking about it.'

Cougar narrows his eyes, not entirely sure that he trusts Jake to somehow actually stop, but he will take his word for it. Leaning up to kiss Jake firmly on the corner of his lips, he moves to push at Jake, giving him a look that says he'd best get up because Cougar has a point to make and he needs some room to do it.

"Up," he says heatedly.

"What? No!" Jake pouts at him as much as he can, not wanting to go anywhere. He's had idle, guilty fantasies about getting between Cougar's thighs, he doesn't want to be pushed away.

But, then again, he can never say no to Cougar ever, so he winds up clambering to his feet. "This better be worth it."

Cougar shifts to where he can sit on the edge of the bed again, expectantly as he stares at Jake, summoning him away with the slightest flick of his fingers. "My letters," he says. "Go find them." Specifically, he wants Jake to find the one where he'd talked about one of his deepest fantasies, of being held down by the wrists and taken apart until his control bled away from him.

"You will know the one. It talks about my wishes."

Jake can't help it, he flushes brightly when Cougar mentions the letter that had nearly caused him to spit out the drink he'd been sipping the day it arrived, the letter he'd hidden at the bottom of his pack like it was a porn mag and he was a guilty teenager just discovering them for the first time.

He does as he's told, moving to the desk, and the drawer he keeps A's letters in.

Fiddling nervously with the edge of the envelope, he returns to stand before Cougar again. "Okay," he says quietly, chewing on his lip.

Cougar settles back on the bed with one knee drawn to his chest lazily, elbow splayed out atop it. He reaches out for the letter so he can read it off, as easy to remember as if he'd written it just today. "Sometimes," he reads, "I think I want nothing more than to be held down. Someone's big, firm hands to bruise my wrists as they pin me to the bed, hips locking me in place. And then, with such love and care, they will take me apart until I can do nothing but squirm and sob and plead for more."

"I cannot ask this in the army," he keeps reading, but now his gaze is higher and on Jake, "but sometimes, I want to give up all my control and be fucked the way I cannot be anywhere else."

He's read that letter so many times, it's embarrassing, he could basically almost quote along with it. It sounds way better in Cougar's hoarse baritone, though. "Jesus, Cougs," he breathes, his hands clenching at his sides. "You know how many times I've jerked off to that letter?"

Inching closer, he almost bangs his shins on the edge of the bed. "I don't have any lube," he points out in a soft whine, sounding pained. "Or condoms. My niece lives here."

Cougar just cocks his brow upwards and sets the letter reverently down where it won't be crushed, before he reaches out to take hold of Jake's hand in his own, yanking him back towards him so that Jake topples on top of his body one more time, cushioned by the kiss Cougar offers up, biting and hungry and determined.

"So then, I do what I suggested in another letter," he says with a shrug, thinking of the one where he'd talked about getting on his knees (if only vaguely).

"Which letter?" Jake asks, hushed, his eyes wide as he slowly inches his hand down to Cougar's hip, holding on for a moment before carefully sliding beneath the hem of his shirt, like if he does it slowly enough he won't be found out and Cougar won't make him stop.

Julie is supposed to be picking Beth up from school and then taking her to soccer practice, so they should have the house to themselves for the next few hours, but Jake can't help feeling like someone will come bursting in at any moment and break this up.

"What do you want to do? ...To me?" The thought of Cougar doing thing to him is thrilling and a little frightening all at once. He obviously has more experience than Jake does in this arena. He'll make it good.

Cougar grins at the hand under his shirt, leaning forward to press a peck of a chaste kiss to Jake's lips just because he can, a little harder because it's not easy to tear himself away, and then he rolls them over so that Jake is on his back and Cougar is straddling him with some space between them, working on getting his pants down.

"Be a good boy and stay quiet," Cougar advises. "And you will find out."

"There's no one here to hear me," he protests, but it doesn't sound very confident. In fact, he almost squeaks it, still sort of feeling like he's in a dream. Any second now, he's going to jerk awake with a keyboard imprinted on his cheek and his glasses askew on his nose, and Beth is going to come busting through the door to tell him all about what happened at practice today.

His hands settle on Cougar's thighs, kneading the hard muscle hidden beneath Cougar's jeans, as he tries not to squirm.

Cougar chides Jake with a cluck of his tongue as he presses back at him to keep him low, not wanting Jake to ruin this because he got too greedy. He leans down to kiss him slowly, a promise of what's to come when he deepens the kiss and uses tongue.

When he feels like he's got Jake fairly worked up, he backs off and shoves Jake's pants down around his knees in one fell swoop, sliding down and taking Jake's cock deep in his mouth without any warning.

Jake has always been almost embarrassingly responsive. It's made his life a living hell, sometimes, but right now, it's blessing. Cougar is clearly a man on a mission, taking firm control of the kiss and leaving Jake practically squirming beneath him.

He shouts, bucking up when Cougar yanks his jeans down and takes his cock all the day down. "Oh fuck, oh fuck, Cougar."

Cougar rears off to give Jake a sharp warning with one bugged out look of his eyes, a hiss caught between his lips, and a smack of his hand to the flank of Jake's leg. "Tranquilo," he reminds him, shaking his head as he ducks back down to his work, his hair sliding along Jake's skin where it hangs.

"You tranquilo," he retorts, swallowing the whine that wants to push past his teeth.

He does bite his lip hard, though, in an effort to keep silent as Cougar slides his mouth back down Jake's dick. Sifting his fingers through Cougar's hair, he clutches the strands in his fists as gently as he can, not wanting to pull but needing to hold on.

Cougar's done this enough times to know what he's doing. There had been the boyfriend, of course, but before he'd met Jake, there had been any number of interactions in back alleys with one night stands that he didn't have to think too hard about. So yes, Cougar's talented at getting on his knees and sucking cock, but he's glad that it's paying off here.

Smirking privately, he slides up so he can take Jake deep before easing back to focus on the head, slipping his hand up to tease a little, just enough pressure at his entrance, just enough to tease what could be.

Jake is a denizen of the internet; he knows the theory of gay sex, but he doesn't have much practical experience, if any. He hasn't had the opportunity to test anything out with another person, and living in Army barracks doesn't give him much privacy to do anything beyond the basic 'jerk off as quickly and quietly as possible.'

That being said, as soon as Cougar's hand starts sliding up his thighs, Jake does his level best to spread them, whining when he finds himself hobbled by his jeans.

Cougar can see the issue, even from where he is. He slips away with a kiss to Jake's hip so he can work on getting the jeans off, shucking them and the boxers to the floor quickly before returning to him, a gleaming look of mischief in his eyes. "I'm your first, yes?" he wants to confirm, knowing from the letters already that he is.

First man to do any of this with him, so he wants to make sure it's special.

He wants to complain when Cougar pulls off, but he can understand the necessity of it, so he keeps quiet and instead tries to help him get him undressed. "You too," he insists, reaching down to grab at Cougar's shirt, yanking in an uncoordinated manner as he's too distracted to be able to move with his characteristic grace.

"Yes," he admits, too turned on to be embarrassed right now, though his ears are bright red.

Cougar rears back to strip his shirt off, letting it pool to the side. He had basically walked around shirtless for most of their stay in Bolivia, in acceptance of the heat being too much to do anything but bend to it. Now, his jeans ride low on his hips, and he's already beginning to glisten a little with sweat as he leans down to go back to sliding his tongue over Jake's length, sucking hard before easing back.

"Then I will take my time," he promises, with another kiss to his hips before he goes back to what might be better seen as torturing Jake with too-light touches of tongue to his cock.

Jake starts whining immediately, squirming. "Cougar, c'mon," he complains, reaching back down to collect up Cougar's hair in his hands.

He's pretty well used to seeing Cougar's body, as distracting as it is, but now that he's allowed to touch...well, he's torn between keeping his hands in Cougar's hair, and reaching down to slide his hands all over Cougar's golden skin. "Don't tease me man, c'mon. Please."

"First time," is all Cougar reminds him when he backs away and then curls his tongue around the head of Jake's cock before sucking him in deep and easing off to give him a smirk. "Going to take my time." He searches around, though, because he wants to do this properly. "Hair tie," is all he demands, thinking there must be one around here.

"I don't give a shit about my first time," he grumbles, his voice giving out at the end as Cougar curls his tongue around the sensitive head of his cock.

At first, he doesn't understand what Cougar is asking for, and then it clicks. "Maybe—maybe in the desk, I dunno," he says vaguely, pointing over to the other side of the room.